The balance of opposites

I’ve been spending a lot of time lately reflecting on this current journey I am on. Oh what a journey it has been and continues to be. It has been truly magical to witness all that has come into my life over the last five months. I had no idea how transformative this time would be. But here I am, less than half way through, an entirely different being.

It is hard to fathom that so much can change in such a short time. They say healing takes time. Becoming the best version of yourself doesn’t happen overnight. The past five months have felt as if someone pushed the warp speed button on my life. You know the montage section of the movie? Where you see glimpses of all the moments that led to the transformation always meant to happen…I’ve been stuck in what feels like a montage of moments in the best and worst of ways.

Through it all, every magical and messy moment, two themes keep making themselves known. Balance and the contrast of opposites. When I boil these two seemingly different ideas down to the root I find only one thing; yoga.

If you have been reading any of my blogs, you know how impactful yoga has been in my life. The word yoga holds a different definition to each person who speaks it. To me, yoga is the study of the self. Yoga is the process of rewilding everything about my world and finding what aligns with my truest self. Yoga is finding balance. Yoga is understanding that to find balance I must honor the opposing forces of life.

I was just beginning my asana practice, the physical poses that are most often associated with yoga, when I had to stop and laugh at how evident the connection between balance and opposites really are. A common phrase you will hear during a class is, “you practice on your mat to take it off your mat and into life.” It wasn’t the first time, but this morning I was struck with the truth of this little saying.

In nearly every pose, tension is created through opposition. This tension, when done correctly, results in balance. Flexion requires extension. Movement to the right requires movement to the left. The same with forward and backward.

As I was laying on my back at the beginning of practice, with both hands and feet reaching straight up towards the ceiling, I felt perfectly in balance. The weight of both my arms and legs were balanced directly over my shoulders and pelvic girdle. It was effortless to remain balanced here, directly in the center of my being.

As I began to move my feet to the right slightly, my arms drifted to the left, providing opposing tension through my body. Although neither my arms or legs were perfectly centered anymore, balance was still found. I was able to find just as much ease here as I was in the first posture.

I experienced this moment of clarity. Balance doesn’t always come from being exactly in the middle. Balance can be found between the tension of opposites as well. There is different effort required to achieve each state. But I don’t believe one form of balance is superior to the other.

Whether I find balance from standing perfectly still or by utilizing the physics of opposites, I still achieve the goal. The physical practice of yoga teaches us many different ways to find balance. I laugh to think of an entire class spent standing in mountain pose, perfectly centered and balanced, thinking this is the only way to achieve balance. In asana we move our limbs in every direction, constantly challenging our physical relationship to gravity and balance. Learning repetitively how many different variations of our body are possible while still finding our center. In this practice, we also begin to discern how some ways to balance are more challenging than others. That varying levels of strength are necessary for each pose.

In life off the mat, we are constantly asked to balance so many things at once. Our relationships, our jobs, our physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health just to name a few. It seems overwhelming far too often. But what if we remembered the lessons we gain from time on our mat?

There are many ways to find balance. Sometimes it means allowing two parts of ourselves to move in different directions to create tension. And when the tension is right, balance is found. Other times, finding the middle and seeking stillness, will be the way to achieve center. There will be times when we have the strength to find balance in what appears an impossible situation. And other times when we simply cannot hold the tension between opposites without succumbing to the force of gravity.

The mat reminds us how many variations are possible yet they all lead to balance when done well. That opposing forces of strongly contrasting ideas do create tension. But perhaps we can use that tension to find balance as well.

In essence, Yoga teaches us about opposites physically on our mat so we can increase our capacity to mentally hold opposites in our day to day life.

Sometimes I get caught up in the idea that for harmony to be achieved, there cannot be contrasting forces. That the goal is to bring everything to one side of the spectrum and if not achieved, we fail. Imagine if when my feet floated to the right, my hands followed. I would quickly lose balance and end up on my side before I knew it. Opposites are so necessary in balance. Light requires dark, the feminine requires the masculine, flexibility requires stability.

Balance will look different depending on many variables. But the necessity to eliminate opposites is never one of them.

At the end of the day, what I carry off my mat is this. Finding balance is something that requires practice. A practice that will ask us to move in every direction we are capable of, seeking the tensions that create harmony.

Life isn’t about standing still once we find the middle. It is about finding the middle ground wherever we go.