Good vs bad

There is no such thing as good and bad in yoga.

This is a lesson that bears repeating. For me and everyone around me. As I’m sitting in my tent, sweating away in the muggy humidity of Minnesota, not willing to go outside to cool off because of the swarm of bugs that are patiently waiting for my blood, I wanted to call it a bad night of camping.

Everything in me wants to name this experience as bad. But because one of my incredible yoga teachers has repeated the first line above so many times, I decided labeling it may not be the most helpful thing to do. Instead, I sat still for a short bit of breath work and meditation. I let my mind quiet down a bit and my body calm.

As I sat there, focusing on slowing down my breath and being with the experience I was having, everything shifted for me. All of a sudden, it wasn’t so hot and humid and I could barely even hear the mosquitos buzzing anymore. How interesting! Because I calmed my mind down, my reaction to my environment calmed along with it!

Nothing changed yet everything changed. Because I decided not to call this moment bad, it became less bad. It was a quick and simple but wild lesson in the power of our mind.

I am a firm believer that we cannot out think our nervous system and body. I cannot think my way into a perfect life. But our minds are powerful tools that can be our best friend or worst enemy. Depending on how we wield the sword, it can harm or protect. Our mind is our sword. It is always our choice how we use it.

It is so easy to jump to conclusions constantly. To decide that this moment is good and the next is bad. That one person is right and the other is wrong. The problem with that dichotomous thinking is that it requires a lot of assumptions to be made. Today it may be true but tomorrow it may not be so true. Our brains play these tricks on us all the time, not to intentionally harm us but in hopes to protect us. We label an event as bad so we know what to avoid next time. But as simple and logical as that seems, it can’t always be so.

I’m sure everyone has experienced something they labeled as bad in the past but today they see it as a gift. One example from a few years ago that pops into my mind is this. I was planning on flying back to Ohio to attend my cousins wedding. The night before I got a text that my first leg of the journey was delayed. I didn’t have a long connection between flights so I went a bit early to the airport to see if there was anything I could do to still make it to Ohio in time.

The airlines staff was so kind but at the end of the day, all they could do was get me to Ohio an hour after the wedding began. I decided to call it a loss and stay in Colorado for the weekend. It felt like a bad day. It was the first time I ever had to completely cancel a trip because of flight issues.

But because I stayed in Colorado that weekend, I was able to camp with two of my friends. To this day, that weekend still holds such beautiful memories for me. We had the most perfect weekend, hiking, exploring and connecting in deeply profound ways. There is no way I can say that weekend was bad. I called it bad but it became something so good. When we judge something in the moment, we are sort of attempting to predict the future. I thought it would always be a bad weekend but alas, it was not.

We all experience this on macro and micro levels all the time. Unexpected things that were tough to experience in the moment, become the funniest stories and memories down the road. Mishaps and mistakes become launching off points for beautiful transformations. And it can operate on the opposite direction too. You finally land the dream job but realize it is a horrible fit. Or the classic, you meet your hero and they are not exactly kind.

I’m writing this simply to remind myself that it’s all relative. There is no such thing as good and bad. When I calm myself down and allow the experience to simply happen, without judging it, the edges of discomfort soften. We can’t stop the weather so why make yourself miserable while it’s happening?

I haven’t quite achieved the level of perfection of recalling this lesson at all times so the universe gives me lots of practice. Because you know what they say; practice makes perfect!

As soon as I catch myself judging an experience, I attempt to pause. To ask myself why and get curious as to if the situation really needs to be judged. Or perhaps I am making my life a bit harder by judging this moment. My mind, like the sword, is being used to harm rather than protect.

Life is not easy. But our mind can make it so much harder for us if we don’t use it well. Cultivating a healthy relationship with my mind has helped me to step back from a place of judgement all the time. I would much rather be friends than enemies with this wildly curious mind of mine.

At the end of the day, we always have a choice of how we use our mind. Do we allow it to be our friend or do we keep it as our enemy? Is the sword we are holding protecting us our drawing blood? It’s the same mind, the same sword, but how we use them matters.

There is no such thing as good and bad in yoga. Repeat this to yourself as often as necessary. And remember, it’s always our choice how to use our minds.